jinian: (fft ninja)
Hi. I'm leaving the academic job track. In... two days.

Why? Lots of reasons. My postdoc hasn't been successful, which is due in part to trauma and in part to disabilities. The academy is deeply fucked up in a lot of ways that I no longer see it as my job to change. There are brilliant young women out there who love science and will continue to push.

My new job is both science-related and social-justice-related: I'm going to be a manuscript editor for researchers who aren't native English speakers. There's tons of good science being done that may not get a fair shake because of the style it's written in, so I can help! It'll be fun and enriching -- I can learn new science, it'll be my job to read papers, and I'm looking forward to figuring out which grammatical errors go with which native languages. Everyone I've talked to at the company seems awesome, it sounds like a great culture fit, there's room for growth, and I'll be working remotely with flexible hours. It's delightful. I'm delighted.

It's also a loss. I'm okay and angry and thrilled all at once. I could live anywhere now, though I am very disinclined to move with two nineteen-year-old cats. But I won't be teaching students in person like I have been, and I won't be the mentor who helps make advanced degrees happen for talented people, and I won't be the cranky old professor asking pointed questions of the visiting seminar speakers.
jinian: (real scientist)
I can't say the same for the Barbies outside my bedroom window, though.


(Traveled down here today and got started on my sampling of herbarium specimens at the New York Botanical Garden like an awesome person. Very tired now.)
Having a return of serious digestive badness since the whole IUD debacle, so I'm feeling very low on energy and brain. Still, I have some things to say!

Changes in anime art styles over the last several decades are something I had noticed but not qualified this way.

It took tumblr like five minutes after the movie announcement to write a Captain Marvel post-credits scene that causes me to squeal in incoherent delight.

Hilarious send-up of Jonathan Franzen from Twitter.

I have some TOUGH DECISIONS to make about further #scishirt options for this week. XKCD was required, so I wore that yesterday. Today is the shirt Wim brought me from Meguro Parasitological Museum. I guess I'm going to have to go with sentimental value -- Plant Disease, FHL evo-devo course, and Monterey Bay Aquarium -- rather than any of my cool conference shirts or ones that just have plants/animals.

Last night when I was trying to eat food, I had truly amazing applesauce from [personal profile] rushthatspeaks. Wonderful stuff.
jinian: (c'est la vie)
Less pain, better sleep, yaaaaay!

Our front desk person pointed out to me some bird's nest fungi right outside the building, and I got a decent picture with just my phone and a hand lens. Must charge my real camera with the good macro lens and take better ones!

Saw a seminar about the history of the glass flowers and invertebrates.

Helped out J with a very annoying administrative task.

Sent difficult email in a way that I think was both fair and loving.

More fun links:
"babe can i show you my d*ck"
Natural 20s and natural 1s
Anime glasses for all
Aretha Franklin covered "Rolling In The Deep"
jinian: (c'est la vie)
I am alive, just withdrawn! Feeling crummy much of the time due to digestive badness and icky soupy weather. However, recent highlights include:

- Weekend in Manhattan (racing friend, giant rocks in Central Park, HTTYD2 3D, "Seattle-style" teriyaki, the Jane Hotel, the High Line, boat tour: all A+ would trip again; bus AC going out for part of the ride: D-)

- Trip to UConn greenhouse to collect plant material for research (for which I awesomely sourced liquid nitrogen from a welding supply place when my university hookup was somehow completely out, and from which I brought home a new living plant friend as well as all the tissue samples I needed)

- Fine fireworks show and stunning lightning-and-rain storm as ably described by [personal profile] sovay

- Finished a quilt top, found and assembled a suitably interesting backing

- Reading All The Georgette Heyer with occasional dashes of Tamora Pierce
jinian: (garden yukito)
1. Tweet from Joseph Fink ‏@PlanetofFinks:
fans of Tamika Flynn have a lot to look forward to in the next episode.


2. I feel it's a betrayal of the ways of my childhood that I keep and reuse the little bag-holding-shut deals for loaves of bread. Like, she who uses the clippy thing has forgotten the face of her father. And then I'm glad that I have a brain that makes me laugh. :)

3. Accomplished! I now have orange-and-very-plumeria (formerly unscented) lotion and lemon-rosemary (formerly didn't-really-smell-like-honey) conditioner. And I worked usefully on developing a method for another project.

4. I get to see Mom and Dad tomorrow! He was in the hospital briefly but was resting comfortably at home as of this afternoon.

5. Had a great time hanging out with Wim: found excellent jeans for me and a shirt for him (and dozens of eShakti dresses I didn't get, I wish I knew 5x dress-wearers), ran into someone we know and schooled them on aquarium cycling, ate delicious Mexican food, talked a whole bunch, and watched Elementary and ponies.
jinian: chibi Hana from 7 Seeds working hard! (hana stivver)
1. One crow hopping high, down a steeply sloping, intensely green lawn. Another crow, who'd just found a fat worm, startled by the first one's clear intention to share.

2. Girls! Science! Old-timey style!

3. Snarky Twitter-interface meta with old friends/enemies.

4. Femslash Friday Kaylee/Inara is adorable. Not actually on board with the Artemis/Athena comparison (what?) but gay gay Simon! and the undeniable likelihood of awesome toy invention!

5. Today I learned that there are many differences of opinion regarding what's up in the skeleton of a mermaid's hip region. Pelvis or no is the most obvious, of course, and the consequences and interpretations thereof are intriguing. (Image searches inspired by this wonderful anglerfish and mermaid picture, which I also really want a print of now.)

6. The unholy alliance between panicked November yellowjackets and invasive poisonous English ivy has led to a low hedge that hums in an agitated fashion whenever I pass it in the morning. I should probably take another route if I don't want to get stung, but I'm fascinated. Pollen is pretty good food, and there's not much else out there right now. They'll be there until the bitter end.

7. Last night I got to tell Wim my vagina was poison. (No dairy allowed, yeast infection, yogurt, hilarity.)

8. I passed a short stone wall on my walk home tonight that was covered in Virginia creeper. For some reason, the plant always has a funny way of shedding its leaves, leaving the petioles sticking out for a while before dropping them separately later, so the wall had a combination of reddened leaves and pale, jaunty spines that made it look absurdly like a cheerful nudibranch.

9. Yesterday I got a burrito in the school cafeteria, because despite my nightshade problems I usually cannot resist Burrito Day. The cafeteria guy stared at my head transfixed for a moment. "It's like cotton candy," he breathed.

"That's what I was going for!" I said brightly.

He allowed as how it made him want to go to the fair, and I said that was all about elephant ears for me. He suggested funnel cake, I countered with deep-fried butter, which I noted was about as good as you'd think. He wants to try deep-fried Twinkies.

Then he was done making the first part of the burrito, and I said thanks, and he responded, "No, thank you."


10. All recent movies have been good! Searching for Sugar Man, Wreck-It Ralph, and Captain America this week. (I am making an effort to consistently rent things from Scarecrow, because they're amazing and not doing that great financially.) In particular, Wreck-It Ralph was a lot funnier and more interesting than I expected, and I loved that the only romance was secondary and that the little girl character determines her own gender expression.
jinian: Hana, Chisa, and Fujiko from 7 Seeds (three is for victory)

1. Super fun conversation about the pronunciation of "gif" -- this conversation, which occurs near me periodically, is not normally so great, but we had the right combo of linguistics knowledge, history, pickiness, and just messing with people to make it highly entertaining.

2. My sinus-throat doom got worse! That feeling of burning pain represents vindication and rightness in my going to the doctor Monday. Also that I need to drink lots of tea with honey. (Yes okay this as positive is a stretch, but I really did feel all justified and correct for a sec there.)

3. Revised NSF deadlines came out! Friday for me. I am all excited to turn it in, but I have a bunch to do before that.

4. I cleaned off my entire dining-room table. This is huge and totally counts for Tuesday chores. Even if I just moved part of the load to a chair.


1. PI is back and was really happy to see my printed thesis copy on her desk! She wants me to sign it. And write something. And draw a picture maybe. (So adorable.)

2. This proposal is going to be really good when we're done whaling on it, because I am a badass and so are my sponsors. This collaboration is great right now.

3. My experiment today, for which I had planned five hours, took only two and provided a really interesting result.

4. I had a good dinner with M-pig despite eventually getting v. antsy about not working.

5. Lovely sunshiny day, lovely foggy night.
jinian: (bachelor's button bud)
1. Animal guessing game: super lucky cat. Among the first few questions: DOES IT RAISE A PAW. I don't know how I kept a straight face. This was the best thing that happened all week.

2. Awesome skeptical feedback on my proposal! I almost wish I hadn't made it all pretty first, but this way I got to have a "feeling really good about it" stage AND a "yay someone ripped into it where it needed ripping" stage, so it was actually good. (The NSF is back at work but is kinda telling us to fuck off while they regroup, which is fair.)

3. Watched BIG ASS SPIDER! with Wim. Exactly a ridiculous monster B-movie. Very pleased. Also, that was definitely 100% ironic racism, and it was still not okay, so, nice to have that experience for sure I guess.

4. Fun outing with some parents-out-law, to lunch and the lab and the university's phenomenal greenhouse. These things by themselves would've been enough, but our luck was in and the greenhouse manager was there. He opened the terrarium and fed the poison-dart frogs so they'd come up and be photographed, and we got to hang out with the praying mantis too.

5. As I told the cats earlier tonight, I do like doing things that are right, and taking the laundry down from the ceiling fan is pretty indisputably right.

6. I have passed a strange sort of milestone in axolotl ownership: Hachiko is currently in the fridge to recover from her chronic fungus problem. I'm VERY NERVOUS about this because it doesn't seem like the kind of thing one should do to a pet ever, but it's the standard of axolotl care if they're not getting better readily.
jinian: (dandy highwayman)
1. More catty moments from scientific papers: "Nectar and/or pollen are the only floral rewards traditionally investigated. Such myopia has impeded full understanding of flower-visiting organisms." (Also: oh for the days when you could get published by licking your study organism and describing the flavor.) (Also also: bees are not as efficient as bomb calorimetry.)

2. I remain disproportionately amused every time Dan Savage says "ball crushers" as part of the Extreme Restraints ads. There is such relish in his voice.

3. Sassed a dude about using "Hello Ladies" as his salutation to me and PI in professional email. I mean, really. I did appreciate the image of the Old Spice guy working on our microscope, and said so.

4. TINY CHAINSAW ON A STICK I want it so bad

5. Marzipan chocolate made Rainbowgrad friend H really happy. I have rarely seen anyone quite that happy.
jinian: (learning kyo)
1. Oh, scientists, never stop being catty:

The neo-orthodoxy of cladism would dictate that I polarize characters by comparing the character-states in the Malpighiaceae with those found in appropriate outgroups. While I find it impossible to achieve that ideal fully, I agree that in making this kind of argument one should at least be explicit about one's reasons for asserting that any character-state is relatively plesiomorphic or apomorphic, and that much I shall do.

Now that we have reinvented Engler's wheel, can we polarize characters that vary within the Malpighiaceae? Only a few, as it turns out, but I shall do what I can, using a combination of outgroup and ingroup arguments and identifying them as such so that cladistic purists will know which to reject immediately.

This paper as a whole cracked me up multiple times. I think I would like this guy.

The other explanation that I can suggest for colporate pollen in the Old World is that my hypothesis that the family originated in isolation in the New World is wrong.

2. Crisply cool weather, red and orange and yellow leaves.

3. Doctor visit was not terribly interesting, and I don't get to swallow a camera, but progress is a good thing. Endoscopy Monday.
jinian: (takoyaki)

1. Still laughing at everything about this Autostraddle article, study shows.

2. Had a great conversation about our outfits with grad friend G in the morning. He is assembling a retro-style hiking outfit, which includes amazing laced-up shins on the trousers.

3. Frustrating therapist visit did lead me to figure out what was wrong with me on my own! Not so much to solve it though.

4. Experiment that was the devil turned out to have quite an interesting result.

5. Made M-pig (1) dinner, (2) laugh a whole lot.


1. Inner Rarity has been writhing on the fainting couch for some time now. Luckily I also have an inner Twilight Sparkle, today invoked and supported by an excellent t-shirt and nail polish. I made very good progress on the proposal.

2. Akebia fruit! The flowers were so tiny, and the fruit are so big. I didn't try eating them. (also they are totally vulvas, but the only other person who thought so appears to have written a remarkably skeevy poem with which I do not wish to associate myself, so I never said that)

3. The skinny isosceles triangles on the roof of Meany Hall, shining in the pale cyan light.

4. Soup and walking and sex and Rock Band.
jinian: (garden yukito)

1. I found the best paper~! (It is Open Access but may be hard to follow.) Not only is it precisely what I need for this fellowship application, it cites my most recent paper multiple times and calls my previous review paper inadequate in its new analyses, which is totally fair! Scientific dialogue over time! So exciting!
Though they should've written to me to ask if those genes were present in liverworts -- we totally looked and did not find them -- but maybe they are only satisfied with PROOF, which I would understand.

2. Edward Scissorhands soundtrack in Teahouse Kuan Yin. This was the first CD I ever bought; maybe I should watch the movie again at some point. My mom and I always loved the fairy-tale feeling of it, but I'm not sure what I'd think now.

3. Sea serpent and sailboat graffito along the mistaped blobby edge of the blue-white boundary in the teahouse bathroom.


1. I posted a correct comment about women changing their names to men's for marriage. (I mean, I left out the part where sexist traditions creep me out, but there is only so far that's polite to go with someone you've never met.)

2. PI really liked my turquoise tights, and I have pretty much learned how to accept compliments from her. (Assume it could actually be a criticism in disguise, so half-apologize and say something I like about it. If she responds with another more extreme compliment, it was a compliment. Oh, Japanese/American weird PI.)

3. There were many pleasing things about my outfit today, actually.
photos and going on about things )

4. Talked to PI about writing me a letter for the fellowship proposal. Went as submissive as I could, got a good result. Fascinatingly, she said of prospective-advisor, "but wasn't he very rude?" -- wow! She really wanted him to Treat Me Right when I pushed myself on him to visit. :)

5. Great clouds on the walk home.
jinian: (Collomia grandiflora)
1. I did get more sleep this morning! And I had such the best dream. A fun outing to a street market led to frustration and misfortune, but then to adventure and magic and sexy dress-up times and potential new lovers. What a great way to wake up. Who cares if the police are still after you when you have all that?

2. Rewatched Dororo before it was due back. Spammed Twitter about it, amusing mostly myself (but I was so amused).

3. Oh, sed, why did I ever doubt you? You are so hard for me to remember how to work, but you did exactly what I wanted in no time at all.

4. I got the result I was looking for out of my transcriptome data! What I thought was likely to be happening does seem to be happening! This makes it MUCH EASIER to write about intelligently for possible fellowship. Someday I will figure out how to do the overall analysis with the weird data I have been given, instead of a very targeted one on just the genes I wanted, but whatever.

5. I am really enjoying fall so far. It was gloriously blustery with pouring rain today, in the way that usually doesn't happen here -- no thunder, though we've been very lucky with that this year too -- and I was the annoying person who was out in it going WHEE instead of being crabby about getting wet. Plus, the grapes up the street that always smell good have grown a gigantic crop and smell proportionally.
jinian: (c'est la vie)

1. I had a good idea for a nice, fundamental, exploratory experiment using a novel method, which is kind of my strength. Pretty good strength to have, I think.

2. Practical solution for feeling like LJ/DW is deserted: add more people. I've controlled my lists very strictly by the numbers for a very long time, but I am feeling lonely and did in fact manage to finish the Ph.D., so I will try something else now.

3. Breathing. It is better when I remember to do this!

4. Errand and dinner and movie with sweetie. Also smooching.


1. I am a real reviewer of journal manuscripts who gets addressed as Dr., and my initial review was very thorough and helpful now that I look at it again.

2. Today's best text: I'm not sure what you think is lacking in your relationship if she's telling you about vagina songs.

3. Grad friend M invited me to the Q Center lunch, which I would not have gone to and where there were some really sweet talks, and, unexpectedly, the organization I helped start was named as a good thing that happened. (M-pig, the center head seemed to think it was especially good that the grad org was no longer called Bohgof; sorry, I know you will disagree!) Recognition for my activism is good, even if the context implied that they were taking credit for us a little; I think the head knows better than that.

4. I was pretty awesome at conquering software, even if it turned out my data weren't ready for it.

5. Crashed as soon as I got home and slept over 8 hours for the first time in months! If I'm really lucky, I can even sleep some more before it's time to get up. Completely fine with missing a party for this.
jinian: (tomoyo)
1. Escaped being smacked with a Clow Card, because I am good.

2. Invented/kludged an imaging protocol while listening to The Electric Lady.

3. Got the best text from [personal profile] gaudior, and didn't tell the missionary who tried to talk to me just afterward why I was so happy, because I am nice a little misanthropic and intensely private. Being a worldview bomb is fun even when I remain unexploded.

4. I called the GI specialist and made an appointment! Praise me please. :)

5. Dinner with M-pig! Laid waste to her composure with what was basically a dick joke. Ate tasty food in a comforting location. Bought adorable cat-sugar-skull hoodie.

cut for background and dick joke )
jinian: (bad wolf)
This morning's obvious epiphany was, hey, I am messing with my brain pills, OF COURSE I am scatterbrained and strange.

Luckily I amuse myself constantly. From my notes about possible projects on the flight last night, when I wanted to look up papers but couldn't:

curse you, lack of internet, I am in the air whence wifi comes, I should have the MOST wifi right now

jinian: (bachelor's button bud)

1. Really good article with a variety of viewpoints on Golden Rice.

2. Bucko made me laugh and laugh (and cry out, "William S. Broccoli!").

3. Hilariously, "medium-hot" Japanese curry has a just barely detectable spicy aftertaste. Oh, Japanese spice standards. KFC chicken tenders are a pretty good substitute for katsu, though, and Wims can eat the extra-crispy kind!

4. Big Boggle has 50% more blocks. Also "quainter", "secular", other excellence.

5. Quality Rock Band times and sleepover.

There was a considerable hiatus from happiness overnight, though, due to major pain problems.


1. Good day to be home because LAB DRAMZ are clearly going down, and I was in long enough to finish the things that absolutely needed doing today.

2. Wooooo prescription painkillers!

3. Kitty cat photo shoots.

4. Nerdy adorable comic Daisy Owl is delightful.
jinian: (birdsquee)
1. Results (final?) of "emailing vid link to people" experiment observed, intriguing in range and highly satisfactory in content.

2. Software people have either forgotten we had a beef over the number of licenses granted or have decided to capitulate to me completely! This is how it should always work.

3. Really lovely day, sunny and not too hot, without the annoying unSeattlely mugginess we've had so much this year.

4. Research progress and fun microscopy. Microscopes are SO GREAT, you guys. Looking at tiny developing trichomes, which are the cutest, and seeing plants assembling themselves and being able to know about how they do it, yay. Dear everyone who is not obsessed with multicellular development: WE ALL START WITH JUST ONE CELL, OKAY? I FEEL THAT YOU CANNOT BE AWARE OF THIS IMPORTANT FACT.

5. Everything about this last night of my pottery course was super fabulous. Okay, not the scrubbing of ware boards and resulting near-splinter-embedding action, but once the chores were over we had a raku firing where we all worked together very smoothly and almost all the pieces came out great, both my ramen bowls came out of their last firing gorgeous, my blueberry basil pie was highly praised by all, and I had such a good time hanging out with my classmates and Wim.
jinian: (motivation)
Folded laundry

Cleaned up litterbox area

Watered garden and pulled some weeds

Pruned damn holly tree AND nice rhododendron

Caused path in front yard to become a path again, mostly

Organized small minority of books

Wrote to awesome Harvard guy who should hire me

Wrote to library guy who should approve my method of using Creative Commons for my thesis

Provided mission-critical cat substrate


hey love, I'm an inconstant satellite

July 2017

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