can, can't

[jinian]

I only got to plant maybe a dozen trees this past weekend, because my knees objected to clambering over rough ground. It was incredibly frustrating. Am I ever going to be able to do things again? It almost didn't matter that there was a great deal of excellent pie to be had.

But at least I came home to an emailed grade on my programming assignment. Full marks (which is not unusual, he's not a hard grader) plus "Outstanding" and "an absolutely perfect function," which are unusual. Yay me.

Comments

[marzipan-pig.livejournal.com]

yay, I wish I had had pie!

I am with you on the knees; like I don't feel like a dork asking someone else to do my work for me. I went outside to investigate something and had to come back not b/c it was dark and scary but yeah for uneven ground reasons, pissed me off.

damn poorly designed bodies.

[thatmathchick.livejournal.com]

Can we form the I Hate My #@$*&@# Knees Club?

[marzipan-pig.livejournal.com]

I'm actually starting to try to think about visualizing the back of my knee cap as being smooth, or imagining having a normal gait again, and see if that helps. mine is mroe like fucked up stiff than traditionally painful, though any twisty motion changes that balance. I'm hoping more specific exercises for it will help; it kind of scares me coz what if it keeps getting worse, I'm not used to thinking about myself this way.

[jinian.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that last bit. Exactly. I'm starting to think of myself "that way", but I just go in circles every time I start thinking about it: it means I can't bike, but I fucked them up falling from a bike, and dammit I had just started really liking to bike, and now I can't, and argh. And I think about it all the time, and there are so many things I can't do well now.

[marzipan-pig.livejournal.com]

well and unfortunately I've been through that with other chronic problems too, that after a certain point I can't rail against it anymore and just have to come up with some way to deal with it that involves accepting that this is where I really am. but that horrible 'rail/acceptance' line really fucking sucks (and like, MUST I have something new every few years, is it some kind of natural law or something?)

[kalmn.livejournal.com]

are you still in no medical insurance hell?

[jinian.livejournal.com]

No, I'm in the rather less nasty but closely related "not sure how this insurance I have works" hell. I have a long list of things to talk to the doctor about. Probably I will go next week after finals.

[kalmn.livejournal.com]

cool.

in a somewhat gross to think about sort of way, they can in fact sand down the inside of your kneecap. this would fix what snout is talking about; not sure if it would be helpful to you.

[rubricity.livejournal.com]

I can relate to your frustation. I had a pathetic pseudo temper tantrum yesterday (a real one would've been to exhausting) because last week I was able to take Tito on a nice hour long walk around the neighborhood and now I can't walk across the yard without needing to rest.

Here is hoping that your knees get better!

And yay you regardless of everything because you're just nifty. :)